Saying the quiet part out loud
have started saying the subtext out loud in conversation (eg. "by the way I'm asking for reassurance" or "this look means I want you to put that down so we can talk") and honestly the success rate in getting what I want is much higher
— Oliver Darkshire đ (@deathbybadger) July 1, 2022
âSaying the quiet part out loudâ is a phrase Iâve just made up, to describe a method of building alignment on practices within a team. Itâs the habit of stating why you are doing things a certain way, even when you would assume itâs obvious.
For example:
âWe want to do [obviously moral thing] because we are not evilâ
or
âWe shouldn't leave shitty comments in code reviews because we want to build a positive working environmentâ.
It's easy to assume your colleagues a) know these things and b) would do them without prompting.
But it's a form of leadership to state your expectations and beliefs out loud like this. It provides a chance for disagreement and debate by making them public, giving your team the opportunity to challenge your assumptions, or to ask for clarification if their own beliefs donât align with yours.
It takes confidence in your team to offer your priors up to examination in this manner. But also encourages an open and trusting environment, and a culture of honest feedback.
I've noticed colleagues I admire doing this, and Iâm trying to incorporate it into my working habits as well.